Viggo articles which may be offensive to some people

From the London Free Press

I'd like to thank my wang
by Dan Brown, Online Editor


If Viggo Mortensen wins an Oscar, it will be in large part because of his wang.

Providing there’s an Oscar ceremony, we can all look forward to seeing the Eastern Promises star deliver a speech that goes “I’d like to thank director David Cronenberg. I’d like to thank my agent. And last, but not least, I’d like to thank my wang.”

Why will Mortensen give a shout-out to his wang? Because it’s the reason he was nominated in the first place.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying Viggo isn’t a great actor. He is.

But the reason his performance stands out in the dark mob drama is that he was willing to let it all hang out. Literally.

If you’ve seen the movie, you’ll know what I mean.

The film’s climactic scene is a knifefight in a London bathhouse. The reason it’s so tense is that Mortensen’s chauffeur character, Nikolai, is taken by surprise by two assassins.

He has no way to defend himself since he’s naked, as exposed as one man can be.

It’s a difficult scene to watch — not because the full-frontal nudity is offensive in any way, but because the audience can see Nikolai is clearly in danger. One little slip and he could take a sharp blade to the family jewels.

Mortensen was applauded by critics for being willing to bear all in front of the camera and, by extension, the audience.

His character is a man of secrets, so I suppose the nudity represents a feeling of being unprotected for all to see.

Regardless of the symbolism, those few tense moments are the reason reviewers urged movie enthusiasts to see Eastern Promises, and why the Academy nominated the former Lord of the Rings star.

The prominence of Viggo’s wang is, of course, part of a larger trend.

Somewhere along the line, the measure of an actor became how willing he or she is to expose or abuse their body.

It may have been Robert De Niro who started it all, back in Raging Bull. Movie fans still rave about how he purposely expanded his gut to play a boxer gone to seed.

Maybe you remember the buzz when Sigourney Weaver shaved her head for the second Alien sequel. Not many people remember that movie, but they remember she was bald. Natalie Portman did the same in V for Vendetta.
And then there was Tom Hanks. Remember how he starved himself for Cast Away?

For actors today, the question is “What are you willing to do to or with your body?”

Forget having a body of work, it’s now all about working your body, as the accolades showered on Viggo Mortensen demonstrate.

There's always going to be this kind of response. And I'm sure Viggo knew it too. The guy probably has a microscopic one himself. Tee hee Did I say that?

You most certainly did say it!

Oh yes, this is not even the first such article like this I have read. If out of the entire movie and excellent performance, that is the only thing someone can find to write about, I am afraid I do not see much hope for them! Clothed or not, Viggo gave an excellent and very convincing performance in this movie, and deserves to be recognized for the same.

Yes I did. And I'd say it again....

As for me, I would like to thank each and every part of Viggo who brought the character of 'Nikolai' to the screen. Well done!

Phoenix wrote:

You most certainly did say it!

Oh yes, this is not even the first such article like this I have read. If out of the entire movie and excellent performance, that is the only thing someone can find to write about, I am afraid I do not see much hope for them! Clothed or not, Viggo gave an excellent and very convincing performance in this movie, and deserves to be recognized for the same.

It is time for total male nudity to take it's place in the films and art of our age. The male body is as equally beautiful as the female's. If not more so.

Vigs Thy girl wrote:

I prefer to look at Viggo wearing clothes. But if an actress can be naked I guess an actor can, too.

Why not
Male's body is more beautiful than the woman's body!

You mean the Urban Dictionary, Vigs. See link.

Maybe we could post a permanent link to it in a Link section.